The Anxiety of Kalix the Werewolf Read online

  Neither of them knew. All matters of dates and times seemed confusing when transferred from one dimension to another.

  “So if we can’t have anyone human here for the party, who can we ask?”

  They wondered about it, sitting at their table in the living room. It was a small flat, and very old, built above a small shop in Kennington that had been boarded up since they’d arrived. The walls were painted a dull cream, through which the pattern of some ancient wallpaper showed, and the carpet was faded brown and threadbare, much like the couch. Despite the dilapidation of the flat, it was comfortable and warm, and even cheerful, due to the assortment of pictures, ornaments, flowers and candles Moonglow had distributed around the rooms.

  They waited for their tea to brew. Moonglow was fastidious about her tea-making, and regularly produced a well-set-out tray containing a teapot, black china cups, a sugar bowl and a small silver milk jug. The tea had to be left for several minutes to brew properly, and Moonglow would chide anyone who tried to pour it too quickly.

  “What about Decembrius? Should we ask him?”

  “I’m not sure.”

  “Are they still going out with each other?”

  “Were they ever really going out?”

  Decembrius, another member of the MacRinnalch werewolf clan, had certainly been keen on Kalix. They’d slept together on at least one occasion, as far as Moonglow knew. After that, they seemed to have spent most of their time arguing, sometimes violently.

  “What about Thrix?” suggested Moonglow.

  Daniel shuddered. His dark, floppy hair fell over his face, as it did when he was troubled or nervous.

  “I don’t like Thrix.”

  Moonglow didn’t much like Kalix’s older sister either. Thrix MacRinnalch was a very notable werewolf but not a very congenial one. Thrix, often referred to as the Enchantress, was a powerful user of magic. That was unusual for a werewolf. Her sorcery wasn’t her only notable attribute. She was a successful businesswoman, running her own fashion house in London. She was also the only blonde werewolf in the clan, and vain about it. Moonglow and Daniel both thought that she could have been more helpful toward Kalix in the past. Unfortunately, Kalix and Thrix had a history of ill feeling, and relations between them were now worse than ever.

  “I’m sure Kalix wouldn’t want to have Thrix at her birthday party.”

  “Well, on the subject of hostile, unfriendly werewolves, what about Dominil?” suggested Daniel.

  That did seem more promising. Daniel’s description of Kalix’s cousin Dominil was accurate enough—to most people, she was hostile and unfriendly—but Kalix seemed to like her, or at least respect her.

  “I think she gets on reasonably well with Kalix. We should ask her. And the twins too. I’m sure they’re always up for a party.”

  Kalix’s cousins Butix and Delix, twin sister werewolves, were older than Kalix by a few years. They lived a riotous lifestyle in Camden in the north of the city, playing in their own band.

  “That’s probably enough,” said Moonglow. “Vex, the twins and Dominil are enough to create chaos anywhere.” She paused. “But it doesn’t include any boys. Can you have an eighteenth birthday party without any boys?”

  At that moment the door banged downstairs and they heard the sound of heavy boots on the uncarpeted stairwell that led from the street up to their flat. Vex and Kalix trudged into the room carrying heavy orange plastic bags full of shopping.

  “I have totally done my bit of the quota!” yelled Vex, and seemed delighted about it.

  Some months ago, the household had threatened to descend into chaos because of unpaid bills. Moonglow, offended by this, had efficiently marshaled the previously disorganized resources of Daniel, Kalix and Vex, organizing a schedule to pay off their debts. They’d all worked through the summer, stacking shelves at a local supermarket, earning enough money to ease their financial crisis. Emboldened by her success, Moonglow had then organized them into a schedule of housecleaning and shopping. Given the complete disorganization of her three flatmates, this was working surprisingly well. Though there were complaints, everyone was doing their part. The house was tidier than it had ever been, and there was at least a reasonable chance of finding milk in the fridge and soap in the bathroom.

  Work at the supermarket had now come to an end, giving them the last few weeks of summer to rest and enjoy themselves before their new academic years; Daniel and Moonglow at university, Kalix and Vex at college.

  “We really did that shopping!” declared Vex. “I got everything on the list. Except a few boring things. But everything else is right here!”

  She gestured proudly toward the plastic carrier bags. “And I got new hair dye because we’ve saved so much money on the budget.”

  New hair dye hadn’t been on the shopping list, but Moonglow let it pass. Vex’s aunt, Queen Malveria, made a vital contribution to their household, providing Vex with money for food and accommodation every week. Less generous, but still important, was the contribution from Verasa MacRinnalch, Kalix’s mother. Verasa transferred money for Kalix’s upkeep every month into Moonglow’s bank account. Life as students in London seemed to be becoming harder and harder: without the money from Malveria and Verasa, they couldn’t have kept themselves afloat.

  Kalix sat down on the couch. Though the late summer had not turned cold, she wore a long overcoat that stretched down past her knees, hiding the extreme skinniness of her frame. Over the shoulders of the coat her dark hair hung down in a huge wave, abnormally long for either a human or a werewolf. The MacRinnalch women, Moonglow had observed, took good care of their hair. Both Thrix’s golden curls and Dominil’s icy white mane were always beautifully conditioned. Butix and Delix, or Beauty and Delicious, as they had renamed themselves, sported extremely impressive hairstyles, pink and blue respectively.

  “Would you like a party for your eighteenth birthday?” asked Moonglow.

  Kalix looked unsure. “Uh . . .”

  “Birthday? Is it Kalix’s birthday?” Vex leaped from her chair. “We have to have a party. I want a party!” Vex’s dark features lit up with happiness at the prospect. “We’re going to have a party!” cried Vex. “I’ve never had a party before!”

  “It’s a birthday party,” explained Moonglow. “For Kalix.”

  Vex looked disappointed. “Isn’t it my birthday too? I’m sure it must be. Aren’t I turning eighteen as well?”

  “I’m not sure. When is your birthday?”

  “The same day as Kalix!” exclaimed Vex.

  “I’m sure it’s not,” said Moonglow, smiling at Vex’s enthusiasm.

  “But I’m the same age as Kalix! Kalix, we can have a party together!”

  “I don’t think I want a party,” said Kalix quietly. “It makes me nervous.”

  Moonglow nodded. She’d been expecting this. Kalix was very prone to anxiety. The prospect of anything unfamiliar always upset her.

  “Well, there’s plenty of time to think about it,” said Moonglow. “We won’t have it if you don’t want it. But if you do, we could ask a few people—Dominil maybe, and the twins. It wouldn’t be a big affair. Just a little celebration for you turning eighteen.”

  “I don’t think I’d like it,” said Kalix, already defensive.

  “We could go to the cinema!” yelled Vex, loudly enough to make Daniel wince.

  “What?”

  “In the afternoon. Kalix will be a werewolf on her birthday, after the moon comes up, right? So we should go out in the day, do some shopping, then go to the movies in the afternoon. Then we can come back here and have birthday stuff. Like cakes. You have cakes on a birthday, right? I read about it in class.”

  Vex looked pleased with herself for remembering about cakes. Her life in her own dimension as a Fire Elemental had been very different, and she was always pleased when she learned and remembered something new about life on Earth.

  “Kalix can have a big joint of raw beef; you’ll like that, won’t you?” Vex look
ed eagerly toward Kalix, expecting the prospect of a large joint of raw beef to entice her. It didn’t. Though Kalix had a very hearty appetite as a werewolf, at other times she wasn’t keen on eating. Kalix had a difficult relationship with food. It upset her to think about how much she ate as a werewolf. Not long ago, the distress would cause her to be violently sick the next day when she changed back to human. This didn’t happen so often, but if her eating problems were less severe, they were never far away.

  Vex carried on enthusiastically. “We should go and see the Runaways movie!”

  Kalix looked up sharply. “What’s that?”

  “There’s a movie about the Runaways! You love the Runaways, right? On your birthday we should go see the film about them, then come back here and eat cakes. And drink beer. Is there beer at parties? Yes? This is going to be great. I’m so looking forward to turning eighteen!”

  Vex already seemed to have convinced herself that she was turning eighteen too. Moonglow wasn’t certain whether to discourage the notion or not. She didn’t want Kalix’s birthday to be drowned out by Vex’s enthusiasm for her own. On the other hand, it was possible that Vex’s enthusiasm might encourage Kalix to participate. She did seem a little keener on the idea after Vex mentioned the Runaways. They were Kalix’s favorite band, and had been since the days when she’d wandered the streets of London, homeless and alone, with only an old tape of the all-female band for company.

  “I would like to see the film,” conceded Kalix.

  A pleasant aroma of jasmine filled the air. There was a muted orange flash as Queen Malveria appeared. The sudden arrival of the Fire Queen, materializing out of nowhere, had at one time been a startling occurrence for Daniel and Moonglow; over time, they’d grown used to it. She was beautifully attired as always, in a smart gray dress with matching heels and handbag. Since procuring the services of Thrix MacRinnalch as her designer and fashion adviser, Queen Malveria had secured the position of best-dressed woman in the whole Elemental dimension, a position which she guarded jealously.

  “Me and Kalix are having an eighteenth birthday party!” cried Vex.

  The Fire Queen raised an eyebrow and looked questioningly at Moonglow.

  “Kalix’s birthday is soon,” explained the young student. “We were thinking of having a party. Vex wants to join in.”

  Malveria paused to say a polite hello to Daniel, whom she had always liked, before turning her attention to Kalix and Vex.

  “I see. Well, I suppose it could be said that Vex is approaching her eighteenth birthday, in your terms.”

  Vex squealed with delight and leaped around, her boots making thumping noises on the threadbare carpet. Vex had a liking for the heaviest of boots, as if they might anchor her skinny frame to the earth. The Fire Queen regarded her niece with distaste. “Unless my idiotic niece will ruin everything. In that case it could also not be her birthday.”

  “No, I think it’s good,” said Daniel. “Vex and Kalix can have a party together.”

  “Would you like some tea?” Moonglow asked the Fire Queen. Malveria smiled. She always appreciated Moonglow’s hospitality and good manners.

  “Not at this moment. I am on my way to visit Thrix MacRinnalch for an important shoe meeting, and must not tarry. I merely called in to check on my niece.”

  “Hey,” protested Vex. “I don’t need to be checked up on.”

  “You need to be constantly checked, dismal niece. One is relieved to find the house in one piece. Which does remind me, I must cast my eye over the sorcery that encircles this dwelling.”

  Though the flat above the empty shop seemed unremarkable, it had the secret distinction of being protected by the magic of both the Fire Queen and the Werewolf Enchantress. Malveria had altered the dimensions of the attic, making it habitable by her niece, and placed defensive spells around the house to keep Vex and Kalix safe from prying eyes. Thrix’s sorcery likewise protected them, helping to keep Kalix safe from the guild of werewolf hunters. As an added protection, Kalix wore a pendant, a gift from Malveria, which hid her from any form of sorcery, no matter where she traveled. Without it, Kalix would not have survived long in London, where the hunters were active.

  The Fire Queen vanished, traveling upstairs where she examined the sorcerous protection with her experienced eye, before appearing back in the living room, apparently satisfied.

  “Everything is in order. No enemy will find you here. Kalix, are you remembering to wear your pendant?”

  Kalix nodded and then, thinking this might not be polite enough, said, “Yes, thank you.” The young werewolf knew that without the pendant the hunters would have found her by now.

  “Good.” Malveria turned her eyes on her niece. “Are you now in control of your monstrous debts?”

  “Yes, Aunt Malvie,” said Vex.

  “Do not refer to me as Aunt Malvie, dreadful niece. It makes me sound old. Have you been making ready for your next foray into college?”

  “Yes, Aunt Malvie.”

  “Good. As you have now been here for many months, and my sorcery that surrounds this house remains stable, I believe it will be possible for you to extend your stay on this planet to five days a week.”

  The Queen turned to Moonglow. “I apologize if this is inconvenient.”

  “No, it’s fine,” said Moonglow.

  “You are so hospitable, Moonglow. Many people would tremble at the prospect. Agrivex, do not do anything which will disgrace the Hiyasta nation, annoy your hosts or cause me to lose sleep. Life in my palace is moving along in a most satisfactory manner at this moment, and I want no interruptions.”

  With that the Fire Queen bade them a polite farewell, waved a well-manicured hand and dematerialized.

  “I can stay here five days a week!” said Vex, and grinned. Having long ago grown bored with life in the Imperial Palace in the land of the Hiyasta Fire Elementals, Vex was much happier to be living as a student in London, even if it had brought with it the unfamiliar terrors of unpaid bills and a housework rotation.

  “And we’re having a birthday party! We should start planning it right now! I’ll get my marker pens.”

  Vex ran out the room, heading for the attic. There was a brief silence.

  “I’m still not really keen on this,” said Kalix.

  “Sorry,” said Moonglow. “I wasn’t expecting Vex to go mad and start hijacking your birthday. Don’t worry, we’ll have a nice celebration. I won’t let anything spoil it.”

  CHAPTER 3

  Queen Malveria reigned over the Hiyasta Fire Elementals. Bordering her realm was the land of the Hainusta. The two Fire Elemental nations had never been great friends. Throughout their history, there had been many territorial squabbles and occasional outbreaks of war. The last major conflict had been a long time ago, but there were still occasional flare-ups, particularly in the Western Desert, where there was an endless border dispute.

  Queen Malveria’s relations with Asaratanti, Empress of the Hainusta, had never been warm, but as the centuries passed they’d developed a grudging respect for each other. Their subjects were reassured that warfare was unlikely to break out between them. Recently, however, the elderly Asaratanti had passed away in her sleep. Her son and heir, Prince Esarax, had died in an accident on the very same day. Much to everyone’s surprise, Princess Kabachetka acceded to the throne. Fire Elementals everywhere now wondered what the outcome might be, because it was well known that Kabachetka and Malveria hated each other.

  Empress Kabachetka’s palace was situated on the edge of the Eternal Volcano, the huge raging natural furnace from which the nation drew its power. There the Empress was conferring on matters of state with her new chief adviser.

  “Chief Adviser Bakmer, I am not at all happy with my new hair coloring. It is a shade too dark and I specifically asked them not to do that. I am considering a mass execution.”

  Chief Adviser Bakmer nodded gravely. “Executing your hairdressers might not go well with the population, your majesty.”

&
nbsp; “I don’t see why not. Won’t the population be outraged that they got my hair wrong?”

  The Empress glanced in one of the many mirrors that adorned the walls and puckered her lips. “I mean, just look at it.”

  Bakmer experienced the feeling of hopelessness that was rapidly becoming familiar while talking to the Empress. He swiftly concealed his thoughts. Like all the most powerful Elementals, Kabachetka was skilled in reading auras. It paid to be equally skilled in concealing them.

  The Empress looked suspiciously at the papers in her chief adviser’s hand. “Why are you holding that bundle of documents? You know I don’t like documents.”

  “The ratifying of your new officials in each district requires your signature, Great Empress.”

  Kabachetka sighed. Since becoming Empress, she always seemed to be signing some document or other.

  “Put them down somewhere. I’ll sign them later. Meanwhile, kindly initiate a search for a new hairdresser. Someone who knows what ‘ash blonde’ means.”

  Chief Adviser Bakmer looked blank.

  “It’s a hair color,” snapped Kabachetka. “One that suits me well, and will go with this season’s fashions. Approach stylists in the Earthly dimension if necessary. And don’t look at me like that, Bakmer. I had enough trouble with Tarentia when I brought my shoe designers here from Milan.”

  The unfortunate Tarentia had recently suffered disgrace and demotion after proving himself unable to satisfy Empress Kabachetka’s requirements in matters of style. Her new adviser, Bakmer, knew he could easily suffer the same fate. As an ambitious Elemental he didn’t intend to let that happen.

  “The population would most certainly not like to see the Empress in inferior shoes,” he said, very convincingly. “Particularly with several important engagements on the horizon.”

  The Empress smiled. She enjoyed thinking about her upcoming social engagements.

  “Absolutely. When I venture out to that designers’ reception in London, I’ll need the very best shoes that can be obtained in any dimension. The place will be thick with glamorous women from the world of fashion. Malveria will also be there. It is time to put the rapidly aging Fire Queen in her place. Shoes and hair need to be perfect. So find me a competent hairdresser.”